Your Life, Your Decisions

The decisions we make create the life we live; yet when we make decisions, we often default to what we see as the wants and needs of other people. We do not want the choice we make to disappoint or hurt someone we care about.

What if you want something that your friends or family believe is not in your best interest? Let’s say you’re in a relationship that is no longer working, but your family loves your partner and can’t understand why you want to get a divorce. Or what if you have the opportunity to join a group of people starting a new, exciting business, but your friends think you’re nuts to leave your corporate job?

It can be extremely difficult to make a decision which goes against the beliefs and wants of people in your life. However, in the end, you need to know that your life is yours alone to live. You are the only one who truly knows what feels right to you, what amount of risk you are comfortable taking, and what kinds of ideas and adventures spark the passion and excitement you are looking for.

Your responsibility is not to live your life to please other people, for pleasing everyone is impossible. Your responsibility is to live your life in such a way as to bring you the success, joy and fulfillment you need to be a compassionate, caring and contributing human being.

One of the ways to make sure that happens is to focus on making decisions that fit for you. This doesn’t mean you can’t get input from your friends and family; but it does mean developing the ability to sort out their agendas from your own needs and wants. You are the one who will live the consequences of your actions, so you need to be the one in control of the decisions you make. Once again, it’s about not giving away your power. You want to succeed or stumble on your own merits and not because you are trying to please someone else or meet someone else’s needs.

All decisions of consequence involve risk. Without taking risks, we cannot grow and learn. Without taking risks our life grows stagnant and withers. And the irony of all this is that not taking risks is no more secure than taking risks, for our life circumstances can change in an instant without any action on our part. We can get sick, we can be in an accident, or we can become a victim of downsizing and lose our job. There are no guarantees in this life; therefore, what do we really gain by playing it safe?

To be truly successful, happy, and fulfilled in this life takes a lot of work and a lot of courage. Every day we are faced with situations which force us to choose between stepping out and living our lives boldly or playing it safe by withdrawing from life and living our lives in perceived safety. The choice is ours with every decision we make. Which path do you want to take?

Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising which tempt you to believe that your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires courage. – Ralph Waldo Emerson